I always found the saying of this title funny. But there’s a lot of truth to it, and it can have a few different meanings. The one I would like to focus on is the importance of what we say and how we interact with others. It can be so easy to let the heat of the moment lead to words that we regret saying. And while we may apologize and try to rectify the situation, once words have been spoken, they cannot be taken back.

Here are a few tips that can help you to “check yourself before you wreck yourself” (and your relationship). First, try to look at things from the other person’s point of view. I have said several times in previous blogs that things are rarely black and white issues. What is something that you can see from their viewpoint that will help you to understand them more? We want to create empathy, which can cool hot tempers. Next, is this a point that is really worth fighting over? Often, there are so many little things that can add up into what seems like one big thing. Try to tackle the little things one at a time. And a good question to ask is, “Will it really matter 5 years from now?” Sure, if you have to see his dirty socks on the floor ONE MORE TIME it makes you want to flip your lid; but in the grand scheme of things, does it really matter? Finally, if you are having a difficult time with the other tips, walk away. If possible, go somewhere that is peaceful for you or where you are able to calm yourself down. Once you feel that the anger has subsided, it may be a better time to have the conversation.